we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
