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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?

  (312): View more from Illinois

  It's worth it.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  How worth it?

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Back door worth it

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (310): View more from California

  LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.

  (310): View more from California

  And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.

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• (925): View more from California

  She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.

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• (858): View more from California

  Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (903): View more from Texas

  Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Hamster emergency. Can u come in here

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner

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• (903): View more from Texas

  I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.

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