No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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