Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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