so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
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This is the high leading the old right now
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
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Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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