he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
