Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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