You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
