We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
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Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST