it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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