Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Randomize
