Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
