I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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