can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
