Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Randomize