...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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