So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Randomize
