East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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