Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize