So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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