Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
