so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True strength comes from lack of pants
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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