i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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