ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
My ass is underappreciated
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
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