Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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