Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
i now understand why vodka
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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