I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
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