You can't special order awesome
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him