Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help