I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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