and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
