we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
