Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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