what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
