i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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