I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize