10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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