those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
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no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
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So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.