$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
we should paint friendship bongs
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