just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
