Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
