YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
