so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
