come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
