she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
