she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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