if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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