Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
