Hey man sorry I got all grabby
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
