Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
