I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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